What you should look for in your future life partner?!

Are you about to change your single status to just married?! Hold on, take out time and read this, it might help you and give you clarity to take decision. What you must look in your future life partner? Read on:

Character Strength:

 

This can be better evaluated as how the person behaves when put under a challenging situation. Psychologists have proved that humans have highly fragile  character, especially when it is a matter of loosing or gaining something. and matter related to self versus others. Always look for a partner with strong character. These people usually do not undertake any short-cuts, and never compromise with the value system. They display very strong character, fearless and positive.

Educational Background:

No matter what, education has a lion role to play in building the individual character and also in intelligence. We might argue and find education irrelevant at times, but it is the base of the individual talent and one must choose a partner who is educated. Do not run blindly behind over qualification, but also do not settle with average. cause both these have their own limitations and it is difficult to navigate through life.

Financial Strength:

In today’s time along with any other things money is equally important. We see many talented and educated individuals with less or no money, struggle a lot in life. It is possible to earn less in young age, but if person is educated and talented than there is always a scope to earn big. To stay comfortably, along with love we need money too, so be practical and see this side of the coin also.

Empathy & Emotional Intelligence:

There seems a gradual decrease in empathy level of every individual. People are going on either extremes, over sensitive or total insensitive. Being empathetic is a virtue that few people are born with, others have to cultivate it. Empathy can be better tested on societal issues and how much an individual is keeping balance, emotional balance will determine Emotional Intelligence. Respecting self and respecting others are two most important aspects one must see in the future life partner.

Agility & Ability:

Person with agility (flexibility) will have higher chances of surviving odds of life, adjusting to situation and people takes a toll on mental health, if one is flexible enough than it will be a boon in time to come. Ability to adjust, ability to accept failure, ability to bounce back etc. are abilities Must have in the person. If ability is a question mark than one should think before taking a big decision of getting married to that person.

Personality & Presentability:

Personality though comes last but it does come. Personality and Presentability is in fact becomes base for any other traits. If a person has weaker personality he/she will not stand in the race, and always feel low on confidence, that will hamper the growth. On the other hand, too loud a personality is also not a welcome choice. People with loud personality also find themselves isolated and unwanted in a majority crowd. They run a risk of being a object of laugh also at times. Personality and Presentability should match with overall characteristics and culture.

Girls & Boys, be careful of the trap, marriage, be it arrange marriage or love marriage, above 6 points must be thoroughly evaluated before saying “Yes” or “No”

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International Business Etiquette

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Do you know the definition of Business Etiquette? Business etiquette is about building relationships with other people. Etiquette is not about rules & regulations but is about providing basic social comfort and creating an environment where others feel comfortable and secure, this is possible through better communication.

Social media communication platforms (i.e. Facebook, Linkedin) are evolving rapidly day by day, as the concept of social media etiquette becomes a crucial part of business. Business etiquette consists of two things. Firstly, thoughtful consideration of the interests and feelings of others and secondly, being able to minimise misunderstandings.  These are influenced by individual behaviour & demeanour. Business etiquette instructs this behaviour.

Business etiquette differs from region to region and from country to country. This creates a complex situation for people as it is hard to balance the focus on both international business etiquette and other business activities at the same time. Therefore, a wise step is to focus on some key pillars of business etiquette.

Here are some key business etiquette tips that mean real success to business:

‘ Thank You ’ Note

If you want to differentiate yourself from others then never forget to write a‘Thank You’ note to your job interviewer or your client. This will leave a good impression and also reflect well on your company.

Know the Names

Give others respect by knowing their names which will increase goodwill and communication. it is also worth management stepping back and acknowledging people individually for their good work as this will enhance their self esteem and increase motivation.

Observe the ‘Elevator Rule’

Be mindful of saying appropriate things at a job interview or client meeting. Don’t start discussing business with a client or interviewer as soon as you step out of the lift. By doing so, you avoid the risk of damaging your reputation.

Focus on the Face,  Not the Screen

Never forget to switch off your phone and try not to use any other device just to prove you are a multitasking individual. In fact, in the world of business this is considered bad manners. Concentrate on the meeting and listen to what people are saying.

Don’t Judge

Everyone is unique in their own way and uses a different approach to deal with situations. Therefore, if you disagree with another person’s approach instead of criticising try to understand it from their point of view. By doing so, you create a friendly environment. Always remember you get respect by giving respect.

Whether in business or between individuals, one concern is brand awareness. Individuals want to be noticed both socially and professionally. People want to be remembered by others.

However, in the digital landscape you have to be very careful when trying to pursue your brand awareness. Think carefully before doing. What we mean by this is that before creating a hashtag, posting on a Facebook wall or texting – think how the other person will feel when they receive your message.

Character, Behaviour, Honesty

Your character reflects your individuality and your behaviour exhibits your personality. Business etiquette encourages revealing your positive qualities. This helps your reputation.

Always be honest and remember that it takes a long time to develop trust and a good reputation and only one small mistake to lose it. Business etiquette provides a framework for stating the boundaries of terms & conditions, contracts and promises.

Sensitivity & Diplomacy

A key pillar of business etiquette is sensitivity, meaning giving careful thought to every business aspect before making a judgement. This gives a strong foundation to your business. Also, thoughtless words and actions lead to a negative outcome. Being aware of business etiquette encourages careful thought.

Elements of business etiquette

Business etiquette instructs on you how to present yourself professionally in different cultures. The keys for making a good impression are dressing appropriately, your body language, presenting your business cards, gift giving, conducting meetings and many other important elements.

Article curtsy: businessculture.org.

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5 major concerns that give sleepless nights to single parent

Parenting is fun, provided we are trained on that, unfortunately we have to learn by experiences !

5 Major concerns of Single Parents

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1. Timing Crunch: Unable to give time is a loud response of most single and working parent. Work-Life balance is often talked but hardly practiced by these single parents. It is quite an acceptable situation to believe, however a simple rule of life says “Larger the time you invest in any relationship, stronger the relationship will be” Going by this fact, one should plan as much time as possible to be with the child no matter what age is of your child. Here are some time tested techniques:

  • Before and After office hours, make a systematic routine to shrink your world only for your child. Mobile phones and social media are a strict NO.
  • Compulsory joint activity such a swimming, exercising, or even reading books together can bring magical outcome
  • Try not to talk sensitive topics such as career, money, education, friends etc.,until you establish a deeper connection. Do not mimic yourself like your parent.

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2. Missing Emotional Cord: Less time spend with child can lead to constant erosion in emotions. Creche and Baby sitting or even sometime your own people can not provide the emotional cushion that child seeks from you. By saying those sweet words like “love you my prince..” or “take care my princess” will not serve the purpose. What is needed is real emotions and not socially faked one. Here are some recommendations:

  •  Be with child in his/her own small world and just be there.
  •  Undivided attention and caressing as much as you can will help you a lot.
  •  Celebrate smallest moment of their day.
  •  Again, like suggested in earlier point, go on a joint activity, walking, playing etc will help you establish your loving caring image in child’s mind.

 

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3. Lack of trust: As child grows older, he watches you going through your own personal grind, and continue to remain scared of loosing you, soon he will develop fear and mistrust. On the other side, he may start hiding things from you fearing a strong opposition. This cycle becomes frequent as the child grows older and turns in his/her teen age. Most recommended ways to build trust are:

  • Do not hide anything from your child, be it your own relationship with other person, or your professional challenges.
  • Share as much as you can with your child without doubting his/her maturity. This will open the highway of communication.
  • Involve your child in all important matters and discussion, it will instil the sense of responsibility and develop transparency in relationship

 

Man Having A Serious Talk With His Daughter

4. Establishing Disciplines: The most difficult task for single parent is to establish the norms and standards of discipline in house. Since the amount of work and other responsibilities loom over head, parent might end up being softer to the child and more pampering parent. This behaviour is chiefly exhibited with a thought of not letting the child suffer the trauma of having single parent at home. But after sometime it becomes difficult to set the rules. Try following ways if that is the case:

  •  Set the ground rules and announce them.
  •  You adhere each rule without any exception.
  •  Discipline is better inculcated rather than being imposed.
  •  Bring Equality and Transparency in every matter and for every child.

 

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5. Managing Career Aspiration: Majority working single parent feels that career is jeopardised if focus is shifted on child. Parent constantly remain under stress of being selective, selective for career, location, type of work etc. There are cases where even single parents have been successful. It is all about deciding priorities at the beginning and than setting the different family and professional goals. Here are some workable recommendations to manage your career aspiration:

  • First thing first, set your short term, medium term and long term goals. Goals are family goals and professional goals.
  • Identify and create a better support system
  • Set clear expectations with child about the importance and need to have better career. Even you may have to set expectations with your parents.
  • Set expectations with your employer, supervisor and other stake holders, about your time devotion for the work.
  • Develop an acceptance for your strengths and your limitations, this will reduce self-stress.

 

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3 Most Effective ways to Teach Values to our Child

3 Most Effective ways to Teach Values to our Child

As parents we are designed to deliver few essential things to our kids. One such thing is teaching them values. Imagine, a situation where a father is a smoker, and how he would say to his child about “Do not smoke”? Well, exactly this and many other conflicting situations we face with our children.

Let us evaluate this, Out of 100 things that we do for our child, let us list down those which are value based. Of course buying clothes and toys and books would be considered as a mandatory service to our child. But, can we list down few things that will be clearly value based things? For example, asking your child to wash hands before eating food and finishing homework on time every time.

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   1.   One at a time principle:

This is very important as we often give multiple values and overlapping advice, but it leaves little impact or no impact in some cases. Best way is to determine one value and continue to emphasis on that for about a fortnight or a month, depending on the child’s overall acceptance and understanding. Remember do not get tempted to pass on two three values in one go. One at a Time will be much easier for your child to remember and practice.

Father and daughter indoors playing and smiling

    2.  Exemplify your behaviour:

“Practice what you preach” Most parents complain that the child is not obeying the rules, my question to all those parents, “How many time do you obey rules?!” Child learn from observation. He sees you breaking the rules so easily and carelessly, for example while driving your car how often you jump the traffic signal? or how often you reach late to office ? and how often you lie over the phone when your child is listening your phone conversations? these are the indicators that we need to first exemplify the values. 

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    3.  Reward the behaviour genuinely:

It is easier to reinforce the learning if we timely appreciate and reward even a slightest behaviour change in our child. Most parents consider reward as a bribe and hence practice rewarding as and when they want to get over certain things. While few others think that rewarding will result in habit of ‘Give and take’ and so hardly reward their child. Remember parents, if you are willing to make your child a truly value centric adult in future, you got to give rewards for every improvement shown by your child. The catch here is to reward genuinely and reward behaviour. Do not reward for the sake of pleasing the child. Child is smart enough to understand your intention and gestures. You can reward him for keeping his books at a proper place, or watching Television at a scheduled time only, or even may be for washing his own clothes. 

There are several ways we can inculcate the values in our child, but easier is the better. It also gives us a sense of satisfaction when we see immediate and profound change in our child. Do apply above techniques and see the different.

Have a Happy Parenting !

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Shape up your Attitude

5 most effective ways to shape winning Attitude

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Understand your Attitude profile:

It is quite an important aspect to know about what type of attitude we carry. People have been classifying attitude as Positive attitude and Negative attitude. I am giving you another dimension to this, it is not always necessary that we have either of these two. Some time we are in between these two. One may have passive attitude and one may have enrolling attitude also.

Let us assume if attitude is a continuum, then perhaps we can have three more dimensions to add to it.

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Negative Attitude:

  • Not willing to change for better
  • Not ready to accept another perspective
  • Not keen for self-development
  • Only there to blame others
  • Strong belief about ‘nothing will change’
  • Absence of optimism for life’s good thing.

Passive Attitude:

  • Slow in adopting the change
  • Resistive mostly for everything
  • Self-development is last priority if forced
  • Highly contended or portray as satisfied
  • Not much bother about the change
  • Fearful to try out new things

Selective Positive Attitude:

  • Willing to change but within the comfort zone
  • Present logic and debate or do reasoning before adopting the views
  • Self-development is interesting provided if it is quickly benefiting
  • Raises voice or demand better things if all others are doing so
  • Seek support and assurance of own people
  • Prefer to be in the group but will not lead it

Positive Attitude:

  • Shows readiness to change
  • Accept other’s views with fair judgement
  • Ready to invest time for self-development with a view to leverage for growth
  • Support the larger cause and stay away from conflict and conflicting people
  • Seek appreciation or admiration to boost self-morale
  • Willing to take risk but with an assurance to be supported if fail

Enrolling Attitude:

  • Embrace the change and look forward to new challenge
  • Consider and build consensus with others on differing views
  • Self-development is the daily activity and without looking for any quick benefits
  • Take initiative and dissolve the self-identity during a larger cause
  • Do not bother about the appreciation or the outcome, just keep working
  • Shows no fear of any sort, always ready to face new challenge.

5 Ways to shape up Winning Attitude:

  1. Identify your Attitude Profile:

Decides which level you are on the Attitude Continuum.It is important to accept and acknowledge about our own self. Once you know your attitude profile, next is to prepare for the shift. Shift from your current attitude to the new level. Let us accept that human mind does not work like a switch off-on machine, it will develop over a period by repetitive actions and activities. Take one behavior at a time and change it. Behavior change is quite an easy task if done in the presence of a coach or mentor. They will guide you and assist you in your journey.

  1. Expand Knowledge base:

Read books and Stories those are inspiring yet real. Reading books have been proven way to build the strong character of human being. Develop a habit of reading books and implement the learning in your day to day life. Track your progress and make your best friend or buddy as your third umpire, who will give you neutral feedback.

  1. Cut the cord with People:

Delete or Unfriend those people who are negative or keep influencing you negatively. Remember to keep a healthy heart, doctor removes the blocked arteries. If you are surrounded by negative people it is advisable to shift the place or location may be.

  1. Develop Self-belief:

People with higher self-belief grows faster. If you don’t believe in yourself, nobody will believe in you. To enhance Self-belief, start taking decisions, without worrying about the outcome. Soon you will develop confidence on your decision power and will gather the courage to the on bigger tasks.

  1. Keep Monitoring:

Self-monitoring is the best way to change our behavior. In case if you fail to do monitoring take help of your friends, coach or mentor who will tell you where you are heading towards. If you stop monitoring, soon you will see your attitude has stagnated at level and you will not be able to move forward.

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